Friday, October 24, 2008
I'm coming up on my 4 year anniversary of the day I started my weight loss of over 100lbs, that means for 3 years now I've been able to maintain that loss...have I been perfect? No, but I don't need to be perfect, I just need to be the new person I am.
I was asked the other day (as I am often asked), "Are you afraid of gaining the weight back?", this question drives me freakin' crazy! It drives me crazy because it's so typical that people expect former fat people to get fat again! When a fat person loses a large amount of weight, the common response is always, "I wonder how long it will be before they put the weight back on?", not, "I wonder IF they'll put some weight back on"...I'm guilty of this sort of thinking myself!
I know the odds are not in favor of keeping weight off, especially extreme amounts of weight. So why am I not afraid of gaining the weight back?
I am not afraid of being fat again. I will never be 250lb+ again, never. Why not? Because I am not that person anymore, I'm just not. But that doesn't mean I don't remember that 250lb+ person....I will never forget where I came from. Just because I don't "live" there anymore doesn't mean I forgot what it was like. I understand it, I don't judge it. And I don't care what kind of trainer, dietician, nutritionist you are, if you've never had to lose a large amount of weight, then you can't possibly relate to someone who does, in a way that understands that it's about more than food....it's about eating, and the it's about the disconnection with our bodies.
Sure, a motivated person can find the kind of willpower and discipline it takes to reduce calories and exercise to lose weight, but motivation only lasts so long....and then what? You have to change who you are, you have to change how you think about food and eating, and you have to change how you live, permanently. Someone who's never had to do this can only offer the "calories in, calories out" theory.
Many people that have never had to lose weight aren't even healthy themselves, they're just thin, or of a "normal" weight. They can eat any kinds of foods they want, many times processed foods, they don't feel as if they need to pay attention to the quality of the foods they consume, or they just don't think about it. I've had to become conscious of the foods I choose, and the way I eat....lucky me!
Awareness and consciousness is always a good thing. Once you know the difference, you can never "un-know". I will never un-know what it was like to be extremely overweight, and for that I am grateful!