Monday, May 12, 2008

Don't Feel Sad

I felt that this comment, left for me from my last blogpost, deserved some attention....

shawda said...
I read your blogs everyday and love the creativity of your cooking skills. Per your "almost jealous" thought and some of your other postings about food, I have a sense of sadness for you. To struggle with food issues is something I really don't know about, but can't imagine what its like that it controls a huge portion of your life.

Congratulations to you though for overcoming so much and creating a healthy lifestyle and changing bad habits to good. You did it the right way versus your friend!

May 12, 2008 5:51:00 AM PDT

Tracy said...
shawnda,

It's interesting to me that I'm in the middle of writing a blogpost for my other blog, Food and Thought, on the reason why I decided to seperate the two subjects of training and food/eating related topics, when I lost a little steam and decided to check for any comments here, on Rediscovering Strength....and I come across your comment about feeling "sad" for me because you interpret my ability to write about my emotionally driven behaviors as "struggles".

My immediate reaction is one of defensiveness by feeling "sad" for you in return. Sad because instead of relating my particular "struggle" with one of your own....it obviously doesn't apply to food or eating, but we all have them....unless your life is, and has always been "perfect".

Why do you read my stuff everyday? Do you like feeling sad? Or does my life and it's perceived problems make you feel better about your own?

It's funny how I have so much time in my life for being creative with food and cooking, training my ass off, not to mention taking care of a household, being a wife as well as having a part time job, and blogging almost daily.....taking and posting pictures and video takes alot of time and effort, BTW! It's amazing how my "struggle with food" controls such a huge portion of my life, that it's a wonder how I get anything else done! I mean really.....you feel sad for me?

Life is not a struggle, it's an experience. An experience that gives me an opportunity to become my best. To feel my best. To give my best. And if my thoughts about food and eating give me the ability to live my best life, by self reflection, then I'm grateful.

So instead of feeling sad for you, I'm grateful to you. Grateful that you reminded me of how important compassion is. Grateful that I'm not afraid of anyone else's opinion about me and my life so that when my experience can touch someone in a positve way, which it does more often than not via comments and personal e-mails that I get daily, it lifts me up. And grateful that you've given me some inspiration for yet one more blogpost!

PS the point of the last post "almost jealous" was not that of gastric bypass being "right or wrong".... .again another judgement. We are all doing our best, that I know.

May 12, 2008 6:58:00 AM PDT

I don't feel sad for anyone, especially not myself....I never feel sad for myself! And I don't encourage anyone to feel sad for me or themselves or anyone. Having compassion and having pity are two different things. I believe we all have exactly the life experience we create for ourselves with the free will to change things once we become aware, and take responsibility to be our best or make our lives better. I am not a victim of my life, and I don't believe anyone else is either.

I'm the luckiest person I know. Lucky because I recognize how lucky I am. I'm the happiest person I know. I define "happiness" as an appreciation for my life, for my good life.

Every once in a while I question my purpose. I trust that I'm living my purpose.....everyday
.

12 comments:

Christine said...

I find that rather funny, because I've never felt sad for you... I mean, I know you have struggled over the years, you make no secret about it. But your life now is enviable. You live in a beautiful part of the country that it totally conducive to fitness (warm weather, year round farmer's market), your kids are grown (trust me, I REALLY envy that sometimes!), you are married to a kick ass frigging fitness guru for pete's sake! And where should one be feeling sad for you? I don't get it. Life sounds good to me!

-C

1gabby1 said...

Hi Tracy
I hope you had a beautiful mother's day!
You make my day each day that I read your blog. Some day's I feel draggy,mopey pms'y... whatever. Then I read your latest and feel inspired. It is my job to motivate and inspire my clients each day but there are days that I need that too. So I just wanted to thank you for being my kick in the pants when I need it. I've never felt sorry or sad for you, what's the point? You've got a great life.
Thanks again
Gabby

Lisa said...

Wow! Some of what you wrote today is just what I needed to hear. How are you so positive????

Yeah, I think most people have issues with food (whoops I meant to say eating!) or at least body image. I know I do.

Aaron Friday said...

I feel sad that I was born into the male body I currently have. I really feel that I should have been a short, bald and hairy woman with a penis.

But, you know what? Life gives you lemons and, after chucking those lemons at the cars that drive by your house, you take stock of yourself and pretty much do what you feel is best for you. I'm OK with being a guy, at least for now.

Tracy said...

Christine,

I don't like going on the 'defense', but every once in a while I'm sucked into it....oops!

Talking about living somewhere conducive to fitness...go to Santa Barbara! You have to TRY and not live a healthy life style there!

Tracy said...

Gabby,

I currently have 2 jobs, my one day a week manicuring job, and my small business related to KB's.

Yes I can teach people to swing, but most clients that want to hire me specifically are interested in losing weight, which includes many times coaching that involves talking about diet strategies too. So staying inspired and motivated are part of being able to do that job.

Alot of times I think...oh my God, what am I going to say, and is what I say going to make a difference?....there's no "manual" to fall back on....just my own experience, and by living an example. I am always hopeful.

Tracy said...

Lisa,

How do I stay so positive? I don't like the alternative!

Hmmnn...I'll have to apply that answer to some other things in my life! That's a good one!

Tracy said...

Aaron,

I thought you were a short bald hairy woman with a penis...I'm confused.

Oh, and that was you that nailed me in the head with the lemon.....

LizLuvsCrochet said...

How interesting, if this person really read your blogs every day then they would see how you sign almost every posting with "Life is good" -and you are so right- life IS so 'frickin'(in classic Tracy terms) good when you achieve such incredible goals as you have... so how the hell could maintaining them be considered sad?
My girl, be proud of yourself- you have handled an online hater with grace :)

Tracy said...

Liz,

You're awesome! I've got to get you swinging a kettlebell soon! It looks easy, but it'll kick your ass!

Regina said...

Tracy, I've been super busy :) but am getting caught up on your blog posts.

I don't get how anyone could feel sad for you. You are the stinkin luckiest bitch on the planet.

We all have stuff we get to deal with..but like you keep telling me..its an opportunity to learn something--how cool is that. I have learned a lot this past week and it feels stinkin terrific. If I felt sad with all I experience and deal with in my life, I'd never leave the house.

Tracy said...

Regina,

It was great talking with you on Sat., having friends like you, that 'get me' is another reason why I'm so lucky! But everyone is,(lucky!), they just have to feel it and know it!