Tuesday, September 11, 2007

What's My Job?

Lots of stuff going throught my head these days, it seems as if I live in a tornado, constantly moving around (sometimes violently...in a good way) in every direction. I've known for a while that I'm in a constant state of over-thinking things....and that's ok....but sometimes overwhelming.

For the past few years if anyone would ask me what do I do (for "a job"), I would say, " I take care of my family". Even though I have been a manicurist for 25 years, I no longer "make a living" doing that, beause I have the luxury of working part time, and I have other hobbies that allow me to shop and spend. I love my job at home, especially being a wife.

But something happened a few weeks ago that scared me a little bit.....I didn't feel like working out. Now, I often feel like I'm stalling, getting my ass out to the gym to start my workout, but this particular time, I got "busy" doing other things that I was having more "fun" doing, and I wanted to skip my workout. Stalling, and skipping, are two different things! It scared me.

It scared me because I realized, after reflecting on that feeling, that I was standing at a point of chosing life or chosing death. Now, I know, that seems dramatic, it was! I was standing in a doorway with life on one side and death on the other ( life = feeling good, death = feeling bad), and I had to chose life, I have to choose it everyday. I chose to feel good, I have to. I refuse to waste any more time, any more of my life feeling less than good.

Luckily, it passed (the drama). But it helped me, and reminded me, that I've got work to do. And what work is that? My ketttlebell workouts, my yoga and my food has to be a permanent part of my life, it has to. How can I make sure that happens? I have to keep living it and promoting it. I have to surround myself with it...and I do.....but more....this is my job!

I'm convinced I have something of value in the way of helping others increase the quality their of life, physically and mentally. I, of course, can teach someone how to swing a kettlebell, and teach someone how to make a salad, but I'm living proof that a person can start thinking and feeling in a more hopeful and positive way, can I teach that??? I don't know, but I can try!

Everyone of us has the power to chose the life we want....to feel good....to feel this good life....I can't chose for you. But I can continue to remind you! I can continue to share, and show you how I do it....it's work! Some of you I'll meet in person, and some I will never met in person, but know this, like I know this,

Life is good
Life is hopeful
Life is exciting

I'm so very lucky because it's my job to feel good, and when I feel good, good things happen. It will all fall into place. My life is my "living", and my journey is my job.

5 comments:

Lauren said...

Tracy,

By having this blog you teach and motivate people every day to take control of their life and be a healthier individual. Just looking at your journey it really truly shows there are no reasons why someone can't turn their life around. I'm a motivator myself, but being a human being, which I don't always like to admit, I need that extra push as well. Having you share your honesty with us has helped more than you will ever know! 8-)

We just might cross paths one day. I think I will try to go to the Level 2 June RKC. Hopefully you'll be there as well!

Tracy said...

Lauren,

I never know, these days, if I'm getting "korny", but I can't help it, it's just who I am and how I feel. Thank you for "getiing it", I got goose bumps reading your comment...thank you so much!

RKC level two, YEA, maybe I should go....yes, I will!! See you there!

Lauren said...

Corny is good sometimes. My comment was a bit on the corny side but it was completely sincere and from the heart! See there I go again!

Awesome about level two! It's a Date, even though it's far away. More reason to train for the pistols, pull-ups, etc....

AikiBudo said...

Thanks for sharing your inner struggle, Tracy. This is so helpful to so many people! For many it is never quite so conscious and it needs to be if they are going to change.

After all you have accomplished, it is instructive to see that it isn't all just 'so easy for you'. There is still some WORK: Choosing health and life can be work, but hopefully it is or becomes joyful work.

I also read something recently that fits well here I think: The more personal the struggle, the more universal it is.

I never quite cognized what you wrote today before, but as soon as i read it, the light went on! THAT'S IT! I can relate to that experience!

You have articulated a challenge countless people must face countless times! Well done!

Tracy said...

aikibudo,

It IS joyful work!

I almost added at the end of this post, "I love my job!" because I do!

Love, joy, life, are all the same things to me!